"A Writer Writes, Always"

I find myself today thinking about this scene from "Throw Momma From the Train." It's a movie I love about a blocked writer, played by Billy Crystal, who is teaching creative writing to Danny DeVito. Billy Crystal has an ex-wife who stole his latest manuscript and with it, the accolades and paycheck that should rightfully have been his. Danny DeVito is a naive man-boy continually beaten down by his overbearing, bitter, and spiteful mother. When Crystal takes pity on DeVito and tries to help him with his writing, DeVito misinterprets his advice as a business proposition: if he kills Crystal's hated ex-wife, Crystal will return the favor and violently deliver him from Momma. Chaos (and hilarity) ensue.
*warning* the clip I've linked to shows an excerpt from Crystal's class at the beginning of the movie, and includes some suggestive dialogue that may be offensive (the f-word was originally used, but before release, the studio overdubbed it with "pork"--so you see Billy Crystal mouth it, but hear a different word)
I've been trying to structure a novel, and I've learned that writing his horrible. Sometimes inspiration pierces through so clearly that you can just picture your chalet next to J.K. Rowling's house after the world realizes your brilliance. And other times you're forced to think that even though you disdain the Twilight series, Stephanie Meyer is still just a much better writer than you will ever be.
I'm not setting out to write the great American novel. While objectively, I think that my premise is no better or worse than anything else that does get published, I wonder if other writers have this gut-wrenching self-loathing when they think about their work. I wonder if Stephen King, when he's writing his latest novel that I will show no interest in outwardly and then secretly devour, ever stops to think, "This is sooo contrived!"
Anyway, at this point I've got a really rudimentary idea of plot. I have to just remember to write what I'm interested in--not keep thinking about who my target audience should be. Which sounds a little backwards (at least it goes against everything I've ever been taught about writing) but the thought of writing for people to read makes my throat close up, so it's probably healthier to stick with the backwards way for now.
As I'm writing this post, I keep looking up at this black speck on the ceiling. I can't tell if it's a spider or just a random fleck of something--that's the worst part about having bad eyesight. It's not moving, so that's a point for fleck, but if it's a fleck, how did it get there?? I want Brandon to come check it out but I don't want to seem like a wuss or interrupt his flow (he's video game-creating now). But if I check it out and it is a spider, then I run the risk of it being an angry jumping spider and having it jump on my face when I reach up to smoosh it with a kleenex. This is way more compelling than my writing dilemma. It's between me and the door. What if it drops down on to me when I try to leave.....???

Haircuts all around!!

So...after three years of law school, plus bar licensure, I've finally found my calling: hairstylist!!
I did my hair a week and a half ago:

"Before" 

that's the most recent picture of my long hair--it's also my "before" picture for WW--and I've lost 5.2lbs since then!!

"After!" 

I cut my own hair, with lots of thin layers to bring out the natural curl. This was taken right after the cut so it's still wet, but it looks awesome when it's all curled up.

...Then I did Brandon's hair. His hair had grown out over his ears, which I didn't like. I could have solved it with a trim, but it's also way fun to cut hair. I think I'm probably the only non-licensed beautician adult who never cut their hair when they were a little kid and not supposed to but suddenly developed a taste for it as an adult!

"Before"

Look how happy he was--incidentally, we used this as his headshot for our movie casting call last week. It was really fun! Brandon had to pretend like he died (he was a rock and roll star) and I had to be a back-up violinist who was really upset by the fact that he died. 

"After"

He likes it--I swear!!

See...I told you he likes it!!

So, now we both look different--but mainly Brandon--I keep having this "stranger danger" reaction when he first walks into a room. But I like it--I think he looks really cute clean-cut. And his mustache doesn't go up my nose when we smooch!!

Hawk vs Chicken

I meant to blog about this a while ago. I was out in the yard one day when I heard one of the chickens really flapping and squawking and I looked over just in time to see it reared up and flapping and a hawk flying up from the chicken pen. I threw a rock at it (I learned that sticks don't work from past experience) and it flew away. It's just good to know that the chickens can hold their own in battle.

The chickens' first snow

The Big Basement Beautification PART II

Left Handed Comics

When I was a kid I would sometimes practice being blind just in case I someday lost my sight. I tried riding my bike down a hill with my eyes closed once and it didn't go well (I lucked out and landed on the grass so I was ok).

I'm recovering from what I think is tendinitis in my right index finger, but for a long time I thought it was something more serious like terminal degenerative cartilage damage. So I decided I ought to learn to be ambidextrous just in case I lose the use of my right hand, plus I wanted to give my tendinitis a chance to recover fully. In order to learn to write (and draw) with my left hand I've started drawing a comic strip I creatively entitled "Left-handed Comics". Here's the first installment:

This comic was inspired by the Papa John's delivery guy in our neighborhood who shot one of the people who tried to rob him at pepper-spray-point. Don't mess with the pizza guy.

I added the sub/supertitles since my writing is mostly illegible. Anne suggested a better opening line would be "Give me the money and nobody gets hurt", I tend to agree. I'll get her input first on future comics.

The Big Basement Beautification

 After careful consideration, which consisted mostly of me complaining about how dark it was down there, we decided to repaint the basement.

this was our theme--MUCH sunnier!

and to match the theme poster, the new color!

summer day by Sherwin Williams

the old basement. it had an americana theme. i like america, but not americana. if it seems weird that we're doing cuba to replace americana, just remember it could be worse--we could be doing talibana!

the second half of this big project will be some reorganization (much overdue)

here's our practice section on the wall!

There are many steps to painting--it is a nightmare!
1. sample check at the store
2. prime and paint sample on the wall
3. love the result!
4. buy all the supplies
5. wash the walls:
     5a. warm water and a little dishsoap
     5b. warm water (realize the dishsoap isn't coming off!!!! AAAAAAAHHH!!!)
     5c. sand off all the little chunkies painted into the old paint by the former homeowners who failed to adequately prep. before painting.
     5d. warm water (again)
6. tape the moulding
7. lay down plastic
8. mix the primer
9. paint the walls with primer.
10. rinse. wait. repeat.
We're on coat 1.5 of 4 planned coats. I started the first one a couple days ago and got halfway done before it got too obnoxious for me to continue. 

so maybe I was frustrated...

one and a half coats!

Brandon says it's bedtime so we're not going to finish the other half today. Maybe soon it will be perfect down there!

What a Melon!: a photo essay

I am not really a huge fan of choosing watermelons. It is very scary!! Even today's watermelon was a little freaked out by the prospect.

 I drew that face on with permanent marker but I was thinking I might cut it up with the rind on and I didn't want someone to deal with having a scared-looking eye on their food so I put it on tape!

I'm not sure if it turned out or not. Some parts seem really good, while some resemble a rotting sponge.

I had one piece that tasted super disgusting and one that tasted okay (yeah, I went back for more after the disgusting part!

Also, chickens love watermelons!!